Monday, May 10, 2010

Being a Mother

I have a friend, who like me, became a mother through adoption. She spoke in church a couple years ago on Mother's Day and I could relate to her words. She said, "I used to cry every Mother's Day because I was not a mother. Now I cry every Mother's Day because I am a mother."
Every mother out there knows the joys and pains that come with motherhood. I wouldn't trade them for the world.

I always wanted to be a mother. That is what I wanted to be when I grew up. After Steve and I had been married only 2 months, we learned that I was pregnant. We were very happy about the pregnancy because my doctor had told me I would most likely need to use fertility drugs to conceive. Our son, Dakota was born too early weighing only 1.5 pounds. We were blessed to know him on this earth for 25 hours before he was called back to Heaven.

We tried and tried to conceive again. We used fertility drugs with no success. After about 3 years of this, we decided to adopt. Adoption was something we always talked about and was another way of creating a family. A few months later, Madison was born four years almost to the day of Dakota's birth. We were so thrilled to be parents.

When Madison was 18 months old, we decided to try to adopt again. We did all of our paperwork and waited...and waited....and waited. After 2 years of waiting, I learned that I was pregnant again, but the excitement was short-lived as I miscarried 6 weeks into the pregnancy. I was very heart-broken, but I knew that there were more children waiting to join our family in one way or the other.

When Madison was 5, Sierra and Savannah were born. After 3 + years of waiting for another adoption, our dreams were finally realized again (times 2). Sierra and Savannah were such a joy to us and Madison just loved having two babies to help care for. While we were waiting, we would pray every night for our child's birthmother to find us and place her baby with us. Whenever it was Madison's turn to pray, she would pray for her baby sisters to be born soon. When we took Madison to Disneyland when she was 3, she threw a coin into Snow White's wishing well and wished for 2 baby sisters. For her birthday that year, she got twin dollies to play with. She knew all along that 2 sisters would come to our family.

Then, about 2 years ago, we had the feeling that our family still was not complete, which led us on a journey across the Atlantic to Ghana, where we found Lilly. She has been a blessing to us. She has taught us a lot about survival, determination, and sharing what little you have with others.

This year I have 6 more centimeters (and growing) to be grateful for. We thought after Lilly, we were probably done with building our family, but were surprised to find out early this Spring that we are expecting again. I am 12 weeks into this pregnancy and have had 4 ultra-sounds already. Everything looks great. The baby's heartbeat is strong and he/she is growing at a normal rate. We are so well as a bit scared. I am seeing a specialist in high-risk pregnancies and he will stitch my cervix closed in a couple of weeks to hopefully prevent an early appearance of this baby. We told the kids and they are excited about having a new baby in the family. Sierra and Madison want a brother; Savannah and Lilly want another Diva like themselves. We won't know for a few more weeks, but can't wait to find out. Steve and I just want a healthy child. I'm not sure if we would know what to do with a boy after 4 girls, but we could learn. :)

Happy Mother's Day to all the mothers who read my blog!!!